Photo by BRANDON KALPIN
I'm a workaholic.
Today, I feel a little more settled.
That's a good thing.
If you know me at all you would know that I'm always keeping busy doing various projects and juggling numerous jobs. Strangely though within the last few months I find myself slowing down... A LITTLE. It's not voluntary. I used to be able to get up at 7AM take the kids to school, work all day, and at the end of the day cook for everyone, hang out with the family, put them all to bed, and then work until 2AM....sometimes 3 or 4AM. Now, I wake up at 4AM (thanks to my youngest son) They go to school, I get to work, the family comes home, we eat, we hang out, they go to bed, I work until..... 11? Midnight? (1 or 2AM if I strategically have my large cup of black coffee at 9PM)
Ah, those were the days.
All my life I have felt like life wasn't moving fast enough and that my entire life has mainly consisted of waiting for things to happen.
I can't wait to drive.
I can't wait to go to college.
I can't wait to get a job.
I can't wait to get published.
I can't wait to get my next book published and so on and so forth.
I've constantly wanted to look five years ahead. I wanted to get to point B and then I would relax after that.
Now here I am. 35. I realized that I haven't taken any breaks, and it has just been a constant dash onto the next goal.
Then suddenly, a few months back, I had an epiphany.
To summarize all up in two words...BABY STEPS
It started with this lemon tree...
At one point, I was so busy with work I neglected my back yard. I had a BLACK THUMB and everything green in the yard just died a horrible death. This lemon tree was on the brink of death. The stems were brittle, the leaves were yellow and falling off, and it hadn't produced lemons in over a year and a half. Then I thought, that the yard could use some shaping up in general and I started with just this lemon tree.
I watered the shit out of that tree.
I fertilized it.
I removed all of the weeds.
I brought it back to LlFE!!!!
It made me feel good about myself. It was something non work related and most importantly, I was having fun! I started tidying up the yard. I bought more plants to grow. Now, I'm gardening! Now it has become a daily routine for me to go into the back yard and check up on my little garden. I almost feel weird not doing it. It's as if I made a lifestyle change and it was all due to BABY STEPS. I'm buying soil and fancy organic plant foods! My mom would be proud!
That momentum and motivation has rolled into other things.
I bought this awesome bike for myself and I'm suddenly biking everywhere...
Electra Ticino 8D
I've rediscovered my passion for reading! For the last three years I've been too busy to read (or have made excuses to work) but I managed to fly through the Hunger Games trilogy in about a month by slowly picking away at it and now it's on to other books.
Suddenly, my life isn't just about work. I'm like a kid again trying new things, and that really is the best gift I could ever give to myself.
And I owe it all to a little lemon tree.